How to Recognise Depression in Yourself

Depressive disorder. Please tell me. For what reasons could an optimistic, healthy individual experience depression? I thought you could just tell yourself not to feel sorry for yourself when things don't go your way. Imagine a life where your 23-year marriage comes to an end, your soon-to-be ex-husband moves in with your best friend. You're left to deal with two devastated teenagers. Your father and father-in-law pass away from cancer. You face extreme challenges at work. And then there's the condo you bought without knowing what to look for—like, seriously, don't buy a home with a laundry room upstairs over the living room!—and a roof leak, causing the laundry room to leak into the living room. PLUS, you're taking care of a mother who is in dire need.


Do you think you're up to the challenge? Did it really push you over the brink when you also lose your grandmother and mother to cancer the following year? In particular, when you're dealing with MS, a condition that has gone undiagnosed for more than 35 years, and anxiety and stress are the worst things that can happen to someone with MS. Do you think you're up to the challenge?

I discovered that I was unable to do it. Here is a list of symptoms that you should look out for if you suspect you are depressed. OR, if you're like me and think you can handle it, if the rain would just stop; if the roof would just stop leaking (I've gone to the roof guy twice, but nothing has worked; a gallon bucket sits in the foyer to catch the water); or if the kids would just quit acting like "normal" teens—which can be a challenge when you don't have a husband to help you deal with them every day.

Indicators of a depressed disorder are as follows:
1) Decreased motivation and enthusiasm.
2) A lessened capacity to take pleasure in life.
3) Alterations in sleeping or hunger levels.
4) Inability to focus, slowness or fuzziness in thinking, and indecision.
5) Dysphoria, an overwhelming sense of despair, or nervousness.
6) The experience of low self-esteem.
7) Suicide and death ideas that keep coming back.

The "last straw" stands up in my memory. As soon as I saw the seven symptoms listed above, I knew they did not apply to me. Then, I headed to my office on the fourth floor, which happened to have a flat roof, to get some work done because my house was having water issues. As I was engaged in a heated phone conversation with the roofer—he insisted that my roof shouldn't be leaking, and I kept insisting that he should come see the bucket of water in my entryway if he didn't believe me—I suddenly heard the familiar "pitter-patt" sound that had frightened me at home. Water started to seep into my workplace from the ceiling tiles, which I noticed as I glanced up at the ceiling, just around the hanging lights. It was that. I returned home. I woke up that night convinced I could hear a "pitter-patt" coming from the upstairs laundry room as water dripped into my living room. Standing with my back against the wall, I stuffed all of my towels around the washing machine, shut off the water, and had my first anxiety attack. I wondered why I would want to keep living this way if this was my life.

I actually went to see a doctor after this terrifying incident. He had this fantastic little "depression" test that he gave me. He knew I was in a vulnerable state, so he asked me these questions. After reviewing my responses and the comprehensive symptom impairment document I had begun to compile for him, he prescribed antidepressant medicine.

That day, I picked up two—no, three—crucial pieces of information. One of the most important things is to find a doctor you can trust, who gets to know you, and who actually listens when you talk. The second thing he did when he found out about my MS was to inform me that depression is a common side effect of the disease. The Disabilitykey Workbook, accessible at www.disabilitykey.com, is the culmination of my own research on MS symptoms and related systems, including Long Term Disability and Social Security Disability Insurance. I hadn't done this research at the time. Third, I realised that "thinking positive thoughts" or "keeping a stiff upper lip" won't help you overcome depression, regardless of how strong your personality is or how optimistic you are. There is no shame in consulting a medical professional for help if you feel you may be suffering from depression.

Everything I've mentioned up to this point occurred more than ten years ago. Medications for depression are still helping, so I will continue taking them. After a long and fruitless search, I was able to locate the original test administered by my doctor at one of my preferred online resources, the "Institute for Algorithmic Medicine" (the technical term for diagnostic tests used in the medical field). An assessment known as "The Zung Self-Rating Depression Scale" was used. As you go through the questions, keep in mind how each statement rates on this scale:

1) A portion of my time.
2) This is true for me on occasion.
3. For the most part, that's how it is for me.
4. For the most part, in my experience.

I felt sad and depressed.
In the morning, I feel the most refreshed.
Whenever I feel like it, I go into a sobbing episode.
At night, I can't get any sleep.
Just as before, I eat a lot.
Sex is still fun for me.
Somehow, I've managed to shed several pounds.
Constipation is a problem for me.
My pulse is pounding more rapidly than normal.
I don't know why I become exhausted.
As before, my thoughts are crystal clear.
Doing what I used to do is now second nature to me.
I can't sit still and am very fidgety.
The future fills me with optimism.
Unusually, I am more easily irritated.
Making decisions is something I'm good at.
In my mind, I am valuable and indispensable.
I have a pretty full life.
If I were dead, I think other people would be better off.
The things I used to do are still enjoyable to me.

This short assessment, along with your self-assessment of each statement and documentation of any symptoms that may be impairing your ability to function, can help your doctor learn more about you and your circumstances, allowing them to better determine how to improve your quality of life. There may be an alternative to antidepressants that would be more appropriate for your situation. Your doctor will not be able to assist you in helping yourself unless you take the time to educate yourself, keep detailed records, consult with others, and communicate openly with them.

A lot of you are probably wondering how I can bring myself to just share my life on these blogs. I'm doing this and telling you this story so you may know that it's not just you; I've been there, done that, and have the t-shirts to prove it! See the "about us" section of my website, www.disabilitykey.com, for additional information about me.

Oh my goodness!

Location:

Share :